My story.

For anyone who doesn't know me, my name is Jessica. I am heading out to volunteer at God's Littlest Angels Orphanage in Haiti... in FIVE DAYS! I feel like it was just seven months ago when I was thinking this trip was ages away, and now, just like that, its here!

Before I go, I have posted this for anyone reading my blog who was curious to get inside my head to see what brought me to this point, and what prayer requests I have as I prepare to leave.

It all started back in a galaxy far, far away.
No, I lied. It started in grade twelve, when my future was scary and uncertain and I was restless everytime I thought about what career path I wanted to pursue. I still to this day am unsure of where I fit in the job puzzle, but last year it became clear to me that I wanted to take a year off to do something, to have a real experience before I have to settle into the school-career-marraige-kids thing. I wanted to go to Africa initially, but my desire and God's plan were not the same, and of course, His way is always better. I kept my eyes open for other places that God might be able to use me, and soon realized it was staring me right in the face.

I think the first time God's Littlest Angels crossed my mind was when Doug started teaching our Sunday School classes. He wasn't even talking about the orphanage, but it just occured to me in those days that hey... this could be a really cool place to go. I started praying about it shortly after, and GLA kept weighing on my heart and persisting in my mind, so I eventually applied to volunteer and was accepted in June.

Thats where life went completely out of my hands and into God's. Now, with a kind of game plan to shoot for, I decided following graduation to move to Lethbridge and work to save towards my trip. (I chose Lethbridge because I have family and friends that I have worked with at Southern Alberta Bible Camp, so it was kind of a home away from home.) I had given out so many resumes with such little response that it felt hopeless, and I was so overwhelmed. I went down to Lethbridge for an interview with Merry Maids, got hired that day, and was forced to make the transition much faster than I had expected. I had to move in a weekend, set up insurance on the car that my parents gave up for me to use, and start in on this job.

Merry Maids was challenging. Not the work itself, but the people I worked with. I was youngest, and inexperienced, so I didn't get nearly enough shifts to cover even my car insurance. I got very stressed about this. Then one day, my friend Lindsey, who had worked at Sobeys told me that they were looking for a fulltime daytime cashier, and said she would put in a good word for me. This good word ended up landing me an incredible job. I had worked at a Sobeys before, so it was a fairly easy transition, and I was getting forty hours a week - what a God thing! This was the first instance I felt God nudging me to trust Him more fully.

Already stressed about finances, my dad lost his job. This scared me, because I had counted on help from my parents and now it looked like that was out for good. But the one thing that God taught me in this experience was that He is bigger than everything, and my Dad's faith that God had a bigger plan encouraged me.

Sobeys was great, the staff were fantastic and welcoming, and I was actually making money. I found myself growing terribly homesick, but God gave me amazing friends and people that surrounded me and loved me. I feel so blessed for the people that I met and got to know better.

The next obstacle of my trip was the money factor. I don't know about anyone else, but money is one of my biggest sources of stress! God saw me fretting, and I'm pretty sure His thoughts were "Jessica... do you not realize I am so much bigger than any sum of money? That I am holding you in my arms? I will provide!" I sent out a prayer letter, not really expecting anything beyond the prayers of the congregation of my home church which I SO needed! But my church... wow, did they bless me! Not only do I have many people praying for me, but people gave unselfishly and in love. Expenses that I could never have covered on my own were all of a sudden paid, and I was blown away... Here I was, putting God in a box over a measly sum of money, and He had just blown it apart. I finally understand the concept of "MY GOD IS SO BIG", God's provision, God's plan... it has been amazing, and I cannot even explain how thankful I am for the support and prayers I have gotten. Words just fail... and I'm sooooo incredibly grateful! My parents have also contributed so much... taking care of all the little things even when money was tight. I AM BLESSED.

Now, here I am. I leave in five days, and I still find little things to worry about... "Why can't I bring a carry-on? How can I fit everything in this suitcase? What if I miss a flight? What if my mastercard doesn't get here on time? I still need shampoo! ......What if I run out of love?"

I'm flying out on Sunday solo, but yet not alone. I know that whatever airport I land in, whatever crazy situations I might find myself in, God is going to be walking beside me. He'll be holding my hand (which I will most likely have a death grip on!) And He will provide for my weakness, all that I am lacking, all the impossibilities... they just are nothing compared to His power. I haven't even left and I have already seen evidence of that! I can't wait to see what He has in store for me!

As Sunday comes, pray for me.
-Pray for strength, not my human strength but for God's refreshment and renewing, especially in what will be an overwhelming first week.
-Pray for love, so that I can be an outlet of God's unfailing, amazing love for these kids who crave it
-Pray for safe travels, me in an airport trying to figure everything out still makes me giggle nervously!
-Pray that I will not totally slaughter the language (haha) and that the language and culture do not act as a barrier
-Pray that I will be willing. I don't know what experiences or obstacles lie ahead, but I want to be stretched and I want God to be the center of everything I do.
and finally, pray for God's power to rest on me and the other volunteers. Haitian culture practices voodoo, and spiritual warfare can be a struggle. Pray for strength to combat that!

I think I have done enough rambling for one post. I don't know how often I can update this, but I do hope to keep you guys who have done so much for me involved. I am so grateful for you guys!
God bless you all =)

Jessica